. With all the heated debates in the news and political commentary permeating the media these days, many abuse survivors are feeling triggered by the outrageous acts and horrific verbal vomit coming from the mouth of Donald Trump. As a therapist specializing in narcissistic abuse recovery, I am literally sickened myself that a political party could endorse such a malignant narcissist/psychopath as a potential leader of the free world. It is UNFATHOMABLE to me that this individual continues to be supported in the polls.

 DJT is an individual who brags about sexually molesting women. He hasn't paid his taxes (unlike most hard-working Americans); he is a racist, a bigot, a misogynist, a xenophobe, and a homophobe. And yet he still has people supporting him. Folks, this is how Hitler came to power -- passively allowing a fascist dictator to seize power.

For my clients who are survivors of abuse - whether emotional, physical, sexual, domestic violence, etc...this election season is amounting to tremendous anxiety. When survivors see the very behaviors in DJT (a potential leader of the free world) that their abusers engaged in, it's enough to create trauma reactions like panic attacks, flashbacks, insomnia, hypervigilance, and generalized increased stress and anxiety as cortisol and adrenaline surge through their systems.

What I recommend for my clients and other survivors is to shut off the TV. Be selective with what you expose yourself to on social media, TV, radio. Go on a News Diet. Vote. Go to Therapy. Get Pete Walker's book : Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving  and Bessel van der Kolk's The Body Keeps the Score: The Brain, Body and Mind in Healing Trauma. See a trauma-informed therapist who is versed in psychological abuse/ narcissistic abuse.  Connect with mindfulness practices such as meditation, yoga, and hiking. Deepen your circle of authentic support. Know that with support, you will heal. And in time, the election season will be over with. Nourish your mind/body/spirit with a complete break from the toxicity of what has become a disillusioning and sad commentary on the state of our American political system and the people who follow blindly abusive, megalomaniacs.  Take action. Speak up. Abuse is Not Okay. Not by ANYONE, and ESPECIALLY NOT BY THE FUTURE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD.

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800−799−7233  

Many of my clients are recovering from narcissistic abuse, either in work, family or love relationships.  With summer time for many comes a longing and reminiscing for prior love relationships that perhaps were initially full of passion and zing. Ultimately, those who were entangled in a relationship with a narcissist unfortunately did not end up in a healthy, mutually reciprocal exchange of true intimacy, love and respect. Narcissistic abuse and the painful aftermath of recovering and severing a trauma bond are typically what always follows in such a foray with a narcissist. Remaining No Contact with prior emotional abusers (be they narcissists, extreme narcissists called "malignant narcissists", or even psychopaths) is ESSENTIAL for survivors' recovery. I've included prior articles I've written before on these important subjects highlighted above. Please follow those links for further reading. 

Additionally, I find that survivors often forget why they are no longer in contact with their prior abusers. A reminder that cognitive dissonance formed by the trauma bond and emotional abuse by the abuser will sometimes circle around in the psyche and create a sense of pining away for a lost "love". It is during these times that survivors need to be reminded that the abuser they were with, as an extreme narcissist, was not capable of love in a healthy way. One of the greatest articles I have read on the common question: "Did my narcissistic lover ever love me?" was written by Kaleah LaRoache of narcissismfree.com. Her article is eloquently stated here. Remember to stay No Contact ! You are worth it! You deserve healthy connections and love in your circle of support. Don't be afraid to pull those unwanted weeds out of your garden of support. New growth will blossom and bloom as a result in the form of healthy, authentic relationships as you work through your recovery. For further reading, see my ebook Soul Vampires: Reclaiming Your LifeBlood After Narcissistic Abuse.   Please contact me if you are interested in psychotherapy or telehealth consultation.
​ Peace and healing wishes, Andrea Schneider, LCSW

Time has gotten away from me, and I figured I am overdue to update folks...one of my goals is to be more regular with my blog posts. I am sure many can relate to the juggle of just not having enough time -- and that has been where I have been at...so, hopefully with a new season upon us, that will allow me to do more writing on the topics that are near and dear to my practice....1) helping moms and their families with reproductive mental health concerns (perinatal depression/anxiety, traumatic birth, perinatal loss, infertility) AND 2) helping people heal from toxic relationships in love/work/family....I have a practice specialty of narcissistic abuse recovery where I wrote the ebook, Soul Vampires: Reclaming Your LIfe Blood After Narcissistic Abuse (2015) which includes a workbook for survivors. 

I am excited to present on Expressive Arts and New Moms at Postpartum Support International Conference in San DIego this summer. I will be addressing how expressive arts (particularly that of image-making variety) can help new moms heal from the trauma of perinatal depression/anxiety, traumatic birth, infertility and/or perinatal loss. 

I will be publishing a second ebook for survivors of narcissistic abuse as an add-on to my ebook Soul Vampires, which expands upon that guide. Stay tuned for that once I roll it out...

In addition, I am always working on developing more skills to help trauma survivors (whether those recovering from abusive relationships or those healing from reproductive mental health life events)...I have a trauma-informed expressive arts credential from Cathy Malchiodi's Trauma-Informed Practices and Expressive Art Therapy Institute --  I will be working on additional credentials through her institute so that I can continue to offer cutting-edge, trauma-informed and evidence-based interventions for my clients moving from surviving to thriving!

So that is latest, From Andrea's Couch....stay tuned for more details and goings-on as they happen .... Peace and Blessings to All, Andrea :)

In my own quest for self-care, I find that mindfulness meditation is deeply helpful for de-stressing, clearing the mind, and inducing a relaxation response.  This tool is one of the many self-care rituals I recommend to my clients.  I wanted to share some free online resources with you.  This link is a series of free guided meditations from the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center , which includes several recorded audios of body scan, mindfulness meditation, relaxation meditation for sleep, and also in Spanish. I really like this 6 hour Tibetan Deep Meditation Music for relaxation on YouTube as well....it's nice to see so many accessible and free resources to help folks reduce stress and find calm in the busy of the day. 

In a world that is so fast-paced, which typically requires so much juggling of responsibility, it's vitality important we take time for ourselves to slow down and breathe. I found myself scurrying around this week, running from work commitments to family activities, etc.  I realized I needed to chill a bit and get centered. With all the great information out there on mindfulness meditation and the benefits for the mind, body, and emotions, it behooves us to make time for those practices which help us to de-stress. I found a great (free) app called Meditation Timer Pro that is super easy to use when you have a few minutes here or there for meditation. I also found some great links for relaxing meditation music off of YouTube that you can play on your smartphone while the Meditation Timer chimes/gongs at specific intervals that you pre-set. Good stuff! Happy Meditating!  Namaste,    Andrea .

I have written quite a bit about narcissistic abuse recovery, for those who are survivors of this toxic form of emotional abuse. One of the first articles I wrote on the subject was entitled Recovery From Narcissistic Abuse: The Groundhog (Part III)  for goodtherapy.org  Please see my article highlighted above, as well as others in the series at goodtherapy.org , addressing the healing process of narcissistic abuse. Those who are entangled with an extreme narcissist may find the groundhog to be a fitting archetype... a creature who pops up sporadically here and there when it suits him/her, when trolling for narcissistic supply to fuel their fragile egos...and then, the groundhog goes back under ground again, afraid to face what is essential for a healthy relationship: compassion, compromise, accountability, honesty, integrity, authenticity, respect, empathy, and reciprocity, to name a few key elements. By avoiding the necessary growth of a mature adult, extreme narcissists miss out on love and healthy relationships.  For those who have survived relationships with extreme narcissists, you are better off moving forward and connecting with a mature adult companion who is capable of those essential elements of a healthy relationship.